Forgiveness comes first, feelings afterward

Small offenses can be forgiven easily. But when someone hurts you badly and seems to be getting away with it, forgiveness is a real challenge. Until you forgive the offense and let it go, you will constantly feel the weight of it weighing you down. One of the biggest mistakes you can make when it comes to forgiving is thinking that if your feelings don’t immediately change toward someone, you haven’t really forgiven them. No, forgiveness is a decision. It’s an act of your will. You may continue to struggle with feelings of hurt and resentment. That doesn’t invalidate your decision to forgive; it just means healing takes time. And your healing begins the moment you decide to forgive. The Bible says, “Let all bitterness…be put away from you…And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:31-32 NKJV). Once you have done your part, which is to forgive, trust God to do His part, which is to heal your emotions and restore your peace and joy. You have the power to make the decision to forgive, but only God has the power to change your feelings toward the person who hurt you. So trust God to change your heart. Eventually, your feelings will follow and line up with your decisions. In the meantime, “Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him; fret not yourself because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who brings wicked devices to pass. Cease from anger and forsake wrath; fret not yourself – it tends only to evildoing” (Psalm 37:7-8 AMPC).