One Word That Can Increase Your Confidence
I used to be an “I can’t” person. I never quite felt like I had the internal “stuffing” to accomplish things. Despite having a ton of evidence to the contrary, I still often felt incapable every time I faced a new challenge or obstacle.
When I was in school, every time a new “grade level” started, I doubted whether I could pass the classes.
But I always did.
Later, whenever I’d begin a new job, I’d be afraid I wouldn’t be able to “deliver.”
But I always did.
It’s funny, that despite all the evidence showing me otherwise, I still thought I was incapable.
Perhaps it was a self-esteem problem. Or maybe I never quite got affirmed in myself. Or maybe it’s because I felt a strong need to perform growing up. Whatever the reason, for many years, I often “bowed down” to other people’s expertise or opinions to figure things out, rather than my own.
But lately, I’ve learned “I CAN do it.” I CAN figure things out. I DO have what it takes. Part of this change was finally getting tired of my “I can’t’s.” I was tired of feeling unconfident. Tired of relying on others.
And so, I began to catch myself. Whenever, I felt myself “hesitating” in taking care of something in the house—waiting for my husband to do something for me—I tried taking care of it myself first. Whenever I didn’t know how to do something at work, I’d Google or YouTube things myself, before asking a colleague. And sometimes I figured it out. And sometimes I didn’t. But in either case I felt a lot better about myself. More empowered. More capable. Strong.
I learned I CAN do it.
But it takes having a growth mindset. Recognizing that your skills are not “fixed in stone,” but that with practice and effort, you CAN learn, and therefore grow.
And so, I’ve had to add a simple word to my vocabulary.
“I can’t figure this out (yet).” “I can’t do this (yet).” And that little difference in word has changed my approach: from a fear of failure to an attitude of learning.
WHAT TYPE OF MINDSET DO YOU HAVE?
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